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Alone after being bullied

I've been being bullied by a few girls in my friendship group for around 6 months now but stayed in the group because I still had friends in there. However, recently it got worse so I spoke to the school. While it scared them into stopping, I was forced to leave the group and none of the people I thought were my friends supported me. I have nowhere else to go so I sit on my own at breaks and lunch doing revision for my GCSEs in a few months.

I know telling the school was the right thing to do but it feels very lonely. I tried sitting with another group of girls but that didn't work out, and making new friends at this point of my time in school (year 11) would be near impossible.

How can I get over my loneliness and feel happier in my own company?

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there

Being bullied can sometimes affect your confidence and it can be difficult to leave a friendship group when you’re worried about being on your own. Spending time with people who are bullying you can make you feel worse about yourself in the long run. It’s okay to walk away from friendships where you're not being treated like a friend should be.

It takes courage to report bullying but it’s always okay to get help and support when someone is treating you badly. Other friends might be scared of being bullied if they say anything which can make it hard for them to stand up to the bullies. You could try talking privately to the people in the group who don’t bully you to find out what they think.

Lots of times when someone hasn’t been treated well by their friends they can start to doubt themselves. Having confidence in yourself and knowing how lucky people are to have you as a friend is important. Once you start to see that there are lots of reasons to want to be your friend, it’s easier to feel happy with your own company.

Being comfortable with your own company starts with appreciating what you do have and taking your attention away from what you don’t. Being on your own can give you time to notice what’s important to you without being influenced by anyone else and without feeling like you need to say or do what they expect.

The online community at Childline is a great place to share experiences and get advice from other young people. On the message boards you can read about similar experiences and reply to other young people’s posts to share your support and advice. You could start a new thread to talk about the bullying you’ve experienced, to ask for advice about how to make friends or to ask what other young people do when they’re feeling lonely.

Remember you can always talk to a counsellor at Childline for help and support.

Take care,

Sam

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