Hi there,
Thank you for writing to me. It sounds like you are feeling confused because the school have told you off and youre not sure why. From what you have told me it sounds like they were unhappy about your boyfriend hugging and kissing while you are at school.
I dont know if you have ever heard of public displays of affection or PDAs but that is what people sometimes people call hugging and kissing in public. Seeing other peoples PDAs can feel a bit uncomfortable sometimes. Everyone will have their own ideas about how much physical affection its OK to show in front of other people. Most people think that a quick kiss or hug in public is OK but much more than that is best kept for somewhere private. Its absolutely OK to hug and kiss your boyfriend in private if that is what you want and feel comfortable with, but it might be a good idea to tone it down a bit when other people are around.
Lots of places like restaurants, cafes, sports or youth centres will tell people off if they are getting too physically affectionate because its not something that should be happening in front of other people. Some schools might even have specific rules about how much physical contact between students is OK. You havent told me what sort of school you go to, but Im guessing there are probably much younger students there, so its important that they are protected from seeing anything inappropriate.
I hope this helps you to understand why your school might have told you off. Of course, it is possible that they told you off for a different reason and if you think that what I have suggested doesnt sound right then you could always talk to a teacher you like or trust to see if they can help you to understand what happened. If youd like to talk about it more or have any questions, then you are welcome to talk to one of our counsellors, either by calling us on 0800 1111 or logging on for a 1-2-1 chat, which works like instant messenger. You might also find it helpful to have a look at the message boards on the ChildLine website. This is a space where young people can share their experiences and advice and there are sections on school and sex and relationships.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.
