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Hi there,
Thank you for your letter.
It can be frustrating for young people when they want more freedom but cant get it. As we grow from being a child to a teenager to an adult, the amount of freedom we want grows just as much. Parents may not always feel ready to give more freedom.
One way to help things get better in this situation is to talk to your parents and find out in more detail what theyre worried about. Its important that they understand how you feel too, and that you want to develop more freedom and work with them to earn their trust.
It's important to get a really good understanding of what it is that your parents are worried about. It will also be helpful for them to understand what its like for you to not be allowed do things that your friends can do. Having a conversation where you talk about these things might help you come up with a plan where you have a bit more freedom and your parents feel that youll be safe.
This might involve having a set amount of time that youre out for, or meeting a certain person at the park that your parents know and trust. Perhaps calling or texting your parents every so often so they know youre safe would help. It also might be about building up these experiences over time for example, going to a place that your parents see as safe at first then building up to go to the park. Perhaps also going out alone for half an hour at first and then increase this to an hour over time.
If youre worried about starting this conversation with your parents you may find it helpful to have a think about what you want to say to them before you start the conversation. Maybe write down the points you want to mention and practise saying these things either to yourself or you can call a ChildLine counsellor and practise with them.
I hope this has helped you and dont forget if you need to talk this through some more a ChildLine counsellor is always there to listen.
Take care,
Sam
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.