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Hi l*,
Autistic people are all very different and struggle in different ways. You said that your mum's friend's son, K*, struggles to understand things, especially in school. From what you've said it sounds like he struggles to understand other people's personal boundaries as he is often loud and gets in other people's faces. It seems like he annoys people, but then at home he is quiet and really good.
Autistic people can sometimes find it especially difficult to control their own feelings and actions when they're in a place where lots of different things are happening. That could be things like lots of people talking or moving around, or different sounds and colours. I can imagine that school is a place where there is lots of this going on. It might be that K* finds all this information quite overwhelming.
This could create positive feelings for K* - making him feel happy and excited. But it could also create negative feelings, where he is scared, sad or angry. K* may find it extra hard to control his actions when he has these feelings. If you want to help K* when he's acting in a way that makes you think he's upset, then the best way to do that is to ask him what he needs to feel better and support him to do this. Everyone is different, so it's a good idea to talk to K* and find out from him what he feels would help.
You also said that his sister M* has ADHD and she struggles with this. People with ADHD can also find places like school really challenging and it's important that both K* and M* are getting extra support with how to cope. If you want to talk about this or you have any other questions then a Childline counsellor is always here to listen and support you. K* and M* are can also to talk to a Childline counsellor too.
You also said that you are dyslexic. Please don't worry about your spelling. I could understand what you were writing to me. Being dyslexic can be really hard in a number of ways, not just with school work like spelling, but with feelings too. People can feel frustrated and it can also affect how they feel about themselves and affect their self-esteem.
You can talk to a ChildLine counsellor at any time. They are there to support you.
Take care
Sam.
You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.
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