Ask Sam letter

Asker

To Sam

My abuse problem

Hi.

I am a middle school kid and im being abused by my mum. She said she doesn't love me and she hits me almost everyday. Every time i stand up to her i just end up being hit again then sent to my room. One time i woke up late and i got chased by her up the stairs. I locked myself in the bathroom and my sister had to charm me out

What can i do?

Ask Sam

Sam

Hi there,

It's never okay for someone to hurt you - physically or emotionally. Your mum is there to look after you so it's not okay for her to tell you she doesn't love you or to hit you. There are ways to change things at home but they involve telling other people, which means you need to feel ready to do that.

When a young person is being hurt at home it can be difficult to tell someone else. Sometimes young people feel like they are betraying their family by sharing what's happening with someone else. There is never a time when it's wrong to talk about what's happening to you and you are not betraying anyone. It's not your fault.

Knowing who to tell can be a big part of what stops someone from sharing their situation at home. Telling a trusted adult can be really helpful. If you go to school, then a teacher is often a good way to begin. If there is a teacher you feel most comfortable talking to, you could start there - though most schools will have a person who is there especially for situations like this. When someone is being hurt at home they can also get support from social services.

Social services is something you may hear about when the word abuse is mentioned and what they do is often misunderstood. A social worker's job is to make sure you are okay and have somewhere safe to live. This doesn't always mean taking you out of the house to live somewhere else, but it can do in some cases. The important thing to remember is that the social worker is there for you and wants to do what's in your best interests.

Talking about this with Childline confidentially can be a great first step as our counsellors can help you decide what to do next. If you were to talk to us then we can help you take those next steps when you are ready. You can call us (it's free) on 0800 1111 or you could have a 1-2-1 chat with a counsellor online if you would prefer.

Well done for sharing this with me, I hope this helps you work out what to do next.

Take care,

Sam

Need help straight away?

You can talk privately to a counsellor online or call 0800 1111 for free.

Ask me a question

You can ask me about anything you want, there's nothing too big or small. I read every single letter but I can only answer a few each week. My replies are published here on my page.

Write me a letter